This morning after I had finished my daily YouVersion readings, I was scrolling through Instagram a little and stumbled across a post that caught my attention.

There on the screen was a middle-aged man in a gray tee-shirt lying on his back in his driveway, blankly staring up at the sky. He’s not hurt — at least not physically — but he appears to be all but spent. Worn out. Defeated. Exhausted. Overwhelmed by whatever was happening such that all he could do was lay down on the hard cement next to his car. The caption of the video read, “Imagine Jesus whispering this to you…”

What made me really stop and watch — aside from the fact that 99.9% of all social-media posts are NOT of people laying on their driveways — was that it captured my mental picture of myself lately. My initial reaction was, “Oh my God, that’s me! How did they know? That’s exactly how I see my life right now! That’s exactly how I feel inside!”

And then the man closes his tired eyes as a quiet voice begins whispering to him. He doesn’t sob or convulse in tears, he just lays there, listening silently.

It wasn’t for nothing.
   Everything that you’ve been through,
It wasn’t for nothing.

I created you with purpose
   And even through the darkest valley,
You continued to love Me and follow Me.

And I will bless you.

And then I began to sob, those big, ugly, heartfelt sobs that come from the pit of your soul. These beautiful words ministered directly to my heart this morning in a way that nothing else has been able to for quite some time. Again, how did they know? How could they have seen? After all, I hide my emotions pretty well to everyone at the gym, at church, and of course, everyone I work with. How could anyone know exactly what I’ve been feeling, and more importantly, what I’ve been needing to hear for so long?

But He knew. And He cared enough to simply drop that into my feed this morning.

He always knows. And He cares. Our Father sees us in our hardships, our sorrows, our pain, our messes — yes, even in the messes that we ourselves have made — and He cares. He loves us and He cares.

The last seven years of my journey here have been one major upheaval after another, with some better and some worse (and some very worse!). There have been so many changes, transitions, and surprises (especially within the last year), that I almost don’t know where to begin. And while each setback or major life-change is understandable (or even sensible) within the context of the different situations and circumstances at the time, when stepping back and looking at the journey as a whole, it seems like nothing short of a train-wreck in which very little makes sense anymore. No train-wrecks ever make much sense.

But when we go though these deep, dark valleys in which we can’t even begin to see the end, He sees and He knows. Sometimes we run, sometimes we walk, sometimes we crawl, and sometimes when its all just too much, we lay down and stare up at the endless sky above us, searching for a glimmer of light to give us just a little more hope to keep going.

Our faith in Him, our trust in Him, our love for Him, and our dogged clinging to Him through it all — it matters. And it matters greatly to Him. As Job so aptly said during his own ordeal, “Though He slay me, I will trust in Him.” (Job 13:15)

It wasn’t for nothing.
   Everything that you’ve been through,
It wasn’t for nothing.

I created you with purpose
   And even through the darkest valley,
You continued to love Me and follow Me.

And I will bless you.

It isn’t for nothing. He sees and He knows.

It’s my hope that others will see this and be ministered to just as I was today. Regardless of how we may be feeling or what’s overwhelming us, our Father knows. And He cares. And one day when we finally meet Him, He’ll wrap His strong, gentle, loving arms around us and whisper directly into our broken hearts:

“It wasn’t for nothing…”

@jesusthegreatlight
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